Which one are you looking for?

Lots of us dream of having a great love story, and many have their dreams answered. Some have more than one love story and these can be romantic and erotic and wonderful experiences. Great love stories are about romance and desire and passion and excitement and that person may stoke fires that take your breath away. And if we’re lucky, every now and then, we end up with our love story becoming our life story. But not always. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Because, passionate though that one may be, they might not be the one you want to spend forever with. Esther Peral speaks eloquently about this.

Because life is not just about feelings, it’s about values as well: Are you ready to settle down? Are they? Do you want kids? Do they? How many? Do you share the same cultural background? What about education? Family make-up? Socio-economic background? Religious beliefs? Philosophies about money and lifestyle? Do you even dare to introduce them to your family? It’s a hard road spending your life with someone if you don’t share similar values on the important stuff. There may be lots of questions you need answers to before you make the big commitment. And if there aren’t, maybe there should be. “Vive la difference” is all well and good but in our clinic, we see some sticky situations arising from misaligned values. This a common issue in a society like ours, where so many cultures mingle. Almost everyone wants a great love story. In our modern world, it’s almost a rite of passage. Certainly, it’s a reasonable hope for most people. But remember that the Love Story is not necessarily the Life Story and in the long term a lot of pain might be saved by recognizing that there might be a difference.

-Jim Kennedy,

Couples Coach, Abu Dhabi